Tips for Surviving & Thriving as a SAHM, WAHM, & Homeschooling Mama

I never thought I’d see a day when the world would pause to ask us homeschooling moms for advice, but here we are writing blog posts and making videos and offering virtual hugs from our socially distanced spaces in the world. While many of us love our homeschooling lives, we won’t pretend that it’s easy.

Working from home while homeschooling is even more challenging and since we’ve all been newbies at this lifestyle at some point, it’s only fair that we pass on to you the knowledge and encouragement that has been imparted to and/or learned the hard way by us. So, I present to you: Tips for Surviving & Thriving as a SAHM, WAHM, & Homeschooling Mama.

Homeschooling Schedules

One of the first questions I’ve seen new homeschooling parents ask is this: What’s your schedule like? My answer is that we don’t have one. If your kids love strict schedules, knock yourselves out! But we prefer to simply make a list of things we want to accomplish. I make a list for myself and I make a list of assignments my youngest daughter needs to complete. My older kids make their own lists and schedule things accordingly.

Items that absolutely have to be done today go at the top of the list and everything else follows. If we don’t complete something today, that’s ok. It’ll get added to tomorrow’s list. We don’t sweat the small stuff. However, we do monitor our own habits and if we see that we’re constantly pushing things off, then we have to reevaluate and adjust.

If you’re also a new work from home mom (WAHM) I understand that a schedule might feel necessary, and maybe for you it is. I’ve found that I still do better with a to-do list than a schedule, but I do break things down into morning, afternoon, and evening blocks of time. For example, I help my daughter with her school work in the morning. I do any writing that needs to be done in the afternoon. In the evenings, I make dinner and we hang out together as a family around the table for a long time. Then later in the evening I wrap up any loose ends and enjoy some time to myself. That’s my “schedule”.

I also encourage you to determine right now that you will not get bent out of shape if things don’t immediately fall into place. The world is living in a state of fluidity right now. We do ourselves and our children a great disservice if we do not remain malleable during this ever-changing time. So today it didn’t work out well that you tried to make your kids do school while you were taking work calls. Maybe tomorrow you have them do school while you’re making dinner and doing paperwork in the evening. It’s ok if tomorrow’s schedule looks different than today’s. Your ability to adapt and overcome is one of the greatest life lessons your children will ever have modeled for them.

Get Dressed

Most of my homeschool mom friends will completely disagree with this, but for your own self-respect, get dressed. It might be fun to stay in your jammies for a few days as you adjust to this new normal, but if you want to be more efficient and get more done, put some clothes on.

I do know some families who homeschool in their jammies every day and they accomplish everything on their lists and more, but let’s be honest, for most of us, this is just not the case. How you look influences how you feel and how you feel influences what you do. So maybe you don’t want to put your heels on today, but throw on a pair of jeans, swoop your hair up in a mom bun, and put your game face on. Dress like you’re serious about getting things done and you’ll see items being checked off your list throughout the day.

What to Do With the Kids

OK, so you’re up and dressed and you’re ready to make out your to-do lists, but you have no idea what to put on them. No problem!

Your school district may have already emailed you a plan or they may still be working on one. If they haven’t sent you one yet, I’m giving you permission to just chill until they do. There’s no need to waste valuable time and energy putting something together if they’re going to give you other guidelines in the coming days. I promise you that your child will be ok without educational instruction for a few days.

While you’re waiting, that doesn’t mean that you can’t find ways to keep them entertained at home. Use common sense. Ask them to help you brainstorm a list of fun things to do inside. Give them a little extra screen time. Play outside in the yard. Let them FaceTime their friends. But don’t stress about school stuff until your school district has notified you of their plan.

If your school district doesn’t come up with a plan, never fear! Many websites such as Scholastic and PBS Kids offer remote learning options for kids of every age.

Also, consider this time as an opportunity to teach your children other things that they won’t learn from a textbook. Many homeschool families like ours have found that teaching life skills is incredibly valuable and time well spent. So, teach the kids how to make a family recipe. Let them learn how to play the ukulele online. Practice knitting or sewing or crocheting. Teach older kids how to change a flat tire, check the oil, or wash the car. Show them how to research genealogy and create a family tree. The list is endless.

Travel… At Home

If you’re missing out on your Spring Break plans because of the outbreak, I have a fun idea for you: Travel at home! Make a list of destinations that would be fun to visit. They can be here in the US or anywhere in the world.

Next, pack your bags. I’m serious! Pack a suitcase with what you would take with you to that location. Do you need a swimsuit? Snow boots? A hiking pack? Let the kids pack their own bags. It doesn’t matter if they get it wrong. You’re not really going anywhere. But packing alone will keep them busy.

The next morning, when they wake up, announce that on this day you will be visiting Italy. Or Kansas. Or New York City. Or whatever destination you’ve chosen for Day #1. Eat something for breakfast you might eat in that destination, if you have those items on hand (or if you’ve had time to plan). Pull up Google Maps and drop yourself down in the middle of that location. Look around. What do you see? What do you want to visit?

Google will be your friend during this quarantine as there are so many interesting places that give you full tours of their location. Look for museums, theaters, and other attractions that you can browse through. Cast a walk through the Amazon on your TV and let the kids walk a mile in place. Pause to look up interesting birds or other animals that you see. Let them decorate the kitchen like a café in Paris or a restaurant in Mexico. Let them create menus and paintings for the walls. Then enjoy some croissants or some tacos. Let them use their imaginations and learn something in the process.

During the afternoon and evening, watch a movie or a play from that location. Learn a few words from their language if you’ve chosen a location abroad. Read a story that takes place there. Let the kids act out a story. Make a list of things they’d like to do if they ever visit that location.

Put on swimsuits and swim in the bathtub if swimming is relevant to the location you chose. Play with ice cubs if your location is someplace cold. Build pyramids out of graham crackers and frosting. Draw designer gowns from the runways of Paris and Milan. Build the Tower of London out of blocks. Pinterest has tons of ideas for every location imaginable so have fun with it and let them explore the world from the safety of your home.

Your house is going to get messy and its ok. Frankly, nobody is coming over to see it right now and you have more important things to worry about than how neat and tidy your house is. That doesn’t mean you should give up and let the kids take over. But finding balance is an important part of being a SAHM, WAHM, or homeschooling mama. There will be plenty of time for cleaning up messes after the fun has been had.

Working from Home

Working from home sounds like a dream until you try doing it with your littles underfoot. I’ve worked from home while homeschooling for the past 5 years and even with older kids, it’s not always easy, but it’s not impossible.

Here are a few simple Do’s and Don’ts to help you out:

-Don’t set unreasonable expectations. You’re not going to get in a full 8 hour work day while homeschooling your children and keeping your house clean.

-Do set priorities and consider it a huge win if you accomplish your greatest goals.

-Don’t try to cram everything into a certain period of time.

-Do get creative with time management and look at getting work done before the kids wake up or after they go to bed, while your spouse is free, or while they are engaged with an activity that will free you up.

-Don’t expect the kids to read your mind. “Leave me alone, I’m working” isn’t a very helpful set of instructions for children.

-Do have a system in place. For example, I work in a bedroom office and when the door is open, they know they can come in to talk or ask questions. However, when the door is closed, they know that they should go ask their dad or wait until I’m done. If you have to leave your children unattended in another room for a certain period of time, make sure they know when they can come to you and set regular times to come check on them. Again, this depends on their age and ability to take care of themselves. Younger children will require more constant supervision.

-Don’t try to be SuperMom. This is a marathon, but a sprint. If you try working 8 hours AND custom tailoring individual lesson plans for 3 kids AND making homemade, healthy meals AND limiting screen time AND AND AND…you will be exhausted. Everything will fall apart. And literally nobody will care.

-Do just focus on keeping your kids alive, keeping your job, and keeping your sanity. The rest is gravy.

Grace For Us All

Most importantly, during this time of international crisis, show a little grace. Grace for your children. Grace for your school superintendents and teachers. Grace for your employer and employees. Grace for the doctors and nurses and first responders. Grace for your neighbor. Grace for yourself. Together, albeit separated, we are going to get through this.